Maybe you shouldn't buy that

Aug 21

Dog fashion is all the rage…people spend thousands of dollars on coats and shirts and, I don’t know, fedoras for their dogs. But why spend that much when you can make a purchase that says, “Hey, I’m a dog and I know my place,” like NFL Shop’s Philadelphia Eagles Customizable Dog Jersey for $40. The jersey says so much, like that you’re an Eagles fan and that you love your dog enough to buy him clothes, but not quite enough to avoid mocking him and the plight of his people behind his back. [via]

Dog fashion is all the rage…people spend thousands of dollars on coats and shirts and, I don’t know, fedoras for their dogs. But why spend that much when you can make a purchase that says, “Hey, I’m a dog and I know my place,” like NFL Shop’s Philadelphia Eagles Customizable Dog Jersey for $40. The jersey says so much, like that you’re an Eagles fan and that you love your dog enough to buy him clothes, but not quite enough to avoid mocking him and the plight of his people behind his back.

[via]

Aug 20

Who hasn’t dreamed of mailing a box full of feces to someone you hate? Well, what about doing it for someone you love? Meet the $15 Poop Parcels. For that minimal cost, you can mail someone you love (or hate) the gift of crap. Only it’s not real crap, because that’d just be terrible, but a coated chocolate designed to look just like crap. With a card featuring all sorts of poop puns for to celebrate any occasion, what person wouldn’t go nuts over this corny bit of chocolate heaven? [via]

Who hasn’t dreamed of mailing a box full of feces to someone you hate? Well, what about doing it for someone you love? Meet the $15 Poop Parcels. For that minimal cost, you can mail someone you love (or hate) the gift of crap. Only it’s not real crap, because that’d just be terrible, but a coated chocolate designed to look just like crap. With a card featuring all sorts of poop puns for to celebrate any occasion, what person wouldn’t go nuts over this corny bit of chocolate heaven?

[via]

Aug 19

I bought a new leather couch recently and it was a very expensive process. But even brand new, and a sectional, it was less expensive than this $5000 Couch for sale on Craigslist. But my new couch lacks something that this couch doesn’t…jizm. For you see, the couch above was used in several films. Adult films, including “Casting Couch Whores #8” and “Let’s Bust Nuts on these Butt Sluts, Volume 7.” So, at least you know it’ll have only been exemplary ladies. You don’t just waltz into the adult film industry and get a role in the illustrious LBNotBS series without some serious acting chops and a touch of class. [via, thanks Going Like Sixty for the tip!]

I bought a new leather couch recently and it was a very expensive process. But even brand new, and a sectional, it was less expensive than this $5000 Couch for sale on Craigslist. But my new couch lacks something that this couch doesn’t…jizm. For you see, the couch above was used in several films. Adult films, including “Casting Couch Whores #8” and “Let’s Bust Nuts on these Butt Sluts, Volume 7.” So, at least you know it’ll have only been exemplary ladies. You don’t just waltz into the adult film industry and get a role in the illustrious LBNotBS series without some serious acting chops and a touch of class.

[via, thanks Going Like Sixty for the tip!]

Aug 18

This one is a tough call for me…clearly the unpriced CRISTAL Touchscreen Coffee Table Remote is cool; via a touchscreen interface, you can control every appliance and networked device in your home as well as see live shots of your home set-up to more adequately map out the controls for each device. But at the same time, with our lives becoming so increasingly sedentary as more and more technology is created, is something so undoubtedly expensive and technologically advanced necessary? The answer: Yes, so long as it frees up more time for me to beach on the couch and eat Cheetos. Chester Cheetah waits for no man. [via]

This one is a tough call for me…clearly the unpriced CRISTAL Touchscreen Coffee Table Remote is cool; via a touchscreen interface, you can control every appliance and networked device in your home as well as see live shots of your home set-up to more adequately map out the controls for each device. But at the same time, with our lives becoming so increasingly sedentary as more and more technology is created, is something so undoubtedly expensive and technologically advanced necessary? The answer: Yes, so long as it frees up more time for me to beach on the couch and eat Cheetos. Chester Cheetah waits for no man.

[via]

Aug 17

Luxurious vacations are so overrated. People spend thousands just to sit out in the sun, take a couple of pictures, and ultimately have nothing to show for it. If you believe that, but still want to take a vacation, here’s a way to put your money where your mouth is: The $19 “Survivor Special” at the Rancho Bernardo Inn in San Diego. Some expensive hotel rooms come with a view or a couch or even a bowling alley, but who needs all that? With the Survivor Special, you’re limited to just a room with one light in the bathroom for “safety purposes.” Oh and hopefully you like sweating profusely but don’t like showering or using the bathroom, because the room comes bereft of A/C, towels, and toilet paper. Which would be a real step up if you’ve been trapped in Buffalo Bill’s basement for the past 5 months…though there were actually more amenities there if you count the food and lotion. [via]

Luxurious vacations are so overrated. People spend thousands just to sit out in the sun, take a couple of pictures, and ultimately have nothing to show for it. If you believe that, but still want to take a vacation, here’s a way to put your money where your mouth is: The $19 “Survivor Special” at the Rancho Bernardo Inn in San Diego. Some expensive hotel rooms come with a view or a couch or even a bowling alley, but who needs all that? With the Survivor Special, you’re limited to just a room with one light in the bathroom for “safety purposes.” Oh and hopefully you like sweating profusely but don’t like showering or using the bathroom, because the room comes bereft of A/C, towels, and toilet paper. Which would be a real step up if you’ve been trapped in Buffalo Bill’s basement for the past 5 months…though there were actually more amenities there if you count the food and lotion.

[via]